Editor's Note: Happy April Fools' Day! In case you couldn't tell, this was a story for our satirical edition, The Chomicle. Check out more Chomicle stories here, guaranteed to make you laugh, or at ...

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On a typical weekend morning, San Francisco pastry obsessives start lining up outside Butter & Crumble as early as 7 a.m. The wildly popular North Beach bakery doesn’t actually open until 9 a.m., but ...

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